For the Love of Todd i cant think of anything else
by TheresaPizza
Summary: Thanks to Lady Lovett Carter I have a title! *Hands lady a cookie* For the Love of Todd! Unfortunately, I've lost the inspiration I had last summer. Thanks to those who reviewed, and I'll try to have more stories up when I can find the time.
1. Maybe now he'll notice me

This is simply a humorous fanfic that came into my head. (yes, its Sweeney Todd.)

Ch 1: Maybe now he'll notice me

Nellie Lovett had put up with Sweeney ignoring her for long enough. "All he ever does is brood. Well, today will change everything. Today, Sweeney Todd will finally notice me," she hoped. She tied her corset tighter than she or anyone else had ever tied anything. This, she hoped, would grab his attention.

Toby noticed right away. Not only did his mum's chest look ten times bigger than normal, but her breathing was rather shallow and her waist was skinnier. This was obviously another scheme to get that awful man Sweeney's attention. Yesterday she had tried singing and dancing, "DONCHA WISH UR GIRLFRIEND WAS HOT LIKE ME?" the day before she put on cherry red lipstick that made all the male customers whistle. Why did she even like that monster when she had Toby? In Toby's opinion, Mrs. Lovett was too hot for a guy like Sweeney. Heck, she was just plain hot to him!  
But he didn't like that she was trying so hard.

Sweeney was in his usual brooding corner in a fetal position, singing to his razors, "speak to me, friends..."  
"Breakfast, dear!" came Mrs. Lovett's annoyingly cheery voice. Sweeney noticed her breathing was a bit heavier than usual, but he didn't think about it. he had important brooding to do and she was cutting into his precious time.  
"Hello? You listening to me? Well, fine. If you won't take it, I'll set it on the floor in front of you. Eat it when you want." Sweeney muttered his quiet "thanks."

As Mrs. Lovett bent over to set down a tray of bacon, eggs, sausage, and apple juice, Sweeney had a chance to see quite an impressive showing of cleavage. He didn't notice, however, and continued staring at his "friend."

"Please eat at least a little. There's bacon, eggs, sausage, and apple juice," she gasped. At the words 'apple juice' Sweeney perked up and snatched up the glass, spilling apple juice all over himself and the dusty floor. With a sad face he stared up at Mrs. Lovett.  
"I'm sorry, love. That was the last of it." Sweeney's expression became one of confusion, disappointment, and sadness. _Well, there's no use wasting perfectly good apple juice_, he thought. The barber got on his hands and knees and began to lick every delicious drop he could find on himself and the floor.

Sweeney realized what he was doing and remembered Mrs. Lovett was still in the room. He gave her an embarrassed look. "Well, then...I'll just leave you to your business," she muttered. "Damn corset," was the last thing she could breathe out before passing out in the middle of the room.

_Stupid woman. _Sweeney scooped up her tiny figure and carefully carried her downstairs to the couch. After examining Mrs. Lovett thoroughly he found nothing wrong. Suddenly he remembered hearing her whispering something about her corset. With a disgusted look he rolled Nellie on her side with her back facing him. He reached for a string, his heart pounding. "I can't believe I'm actually going to do this." As he began loosening the corset, Mrs. Lovett's breathing becoming more steady. Without realizing it, he had unlaced the entire thing. "Ohhhh...Shit."

With a nervous look he began attempting to re-lace the damn thing. It was much harder than lacing his shoes.

Suddenly, who should appear but...DUN DUN DUN! Toby!


	2. Corset Laces

Is the second chapter. I wrote it last year, and might start writing more chapters.

Chapter 2: Corset Laces

"Mrs. Lovett, mum! I heard a thump upstairs, and when I went up you weren' there, an'...an'...WAT'ER YOU DOIN' TO MRS. LOVET?!" Toby noticed the corset lace in Sweeney's franticly fumbling hands. "Get yer 'ands off 'er you slimy git!"(how ironic. a johnny depp character being called a slimy git-pirates of the caribbean 2)  
"N-n-no! This really isn't what it looks like!" Sweeney stammered, blushing. "It was this silly woman who made the mistake of tying this blasted thing too tight, causing her to faint!"  
She did all that fer you! Why else do you think she was singin' 'dontcha?' yesterd-"  
"That-_That_ was singing? God, I thought she was trying to torture small animals with the high notes! And as for what I now assume to be dancing, I thought she was having muscle spasms." Had she really done all that just so he would notice her?  
Suddenly the heard stirring from the couch. Sweeney had actually completely forgotten Nellie was even there. He looked down on her and saw her staring at the lace in his hand. She sat up, gasping at the realization of what the lace was for. "Mr. T!" she shouted, blushing, trying to keep her corset up and together with her hands (fortunately she was somewhat successful.)  
"Why 'ere? Why now? Why in front of the boy?" Mrs. Lovett's face was redder than her hair, but Sweeney's face beat hers by a loooong shot. Suddenly, after an awkward moment of silence, Mr. Todd exploded, pacing around the room, shouting," No! It wasn't me! It was _you_, with the singing, and the dancing, and the lacing, and the passing out on the floor! Why the hell did you want me to notice you? acknowledge you every morning, don't I? Never mind. I'm going upstairs to brood. By the way-" The barber added, pausing with one hand on the door. "In case you were planning on going out today, we need more apple juice."

And with that, Sweeney left.

Well, that's Chapter two. Please review ^.^


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